There is a newly published author in the village, our Deborah Don, self-esteem and massage therapist at Crossway's Health Centre here in Hilton, has a published book and has collaboration in the pipeline!

The exciting achievement has been a while in the making and was catapulted into being last year when an American scout for women's interest material discovered Deborah Don's material online and offered her a bursary to help her publish her work.

Hesitant at first Deborah did some scouting about of her own to ensure this was not a scam, she found nothing untoward and decided to jump in feet first. The result is an enlightened guide to nourishing one's self, completely.

With more than 25 years of experience in alternative healing therapies, Deborah brings a wealth of knowledge and experience to her work, by teaching the mindful application of self-empowerment through self-healing and building self-esteem.

This unique little book will appeal to anyone who is interested in taking responsibility for their health care. It will guide you as to how to achieve complete health in an easy to manage way, with no diets or punishment and reward cycles.

Everything you need for this you already have in your home, so there is no large financial outlay. It gives you information that you can use with immediate effect, to increase your sense of being in control of your life.

Complete health means living fully.

The books are available from Deborah at R120.00, call her on +27 (0)33 343 3226 or +27 (0)82 228 7943 to order.

Keep an eye on HiltonVillage.co.za for news of future book signings in Hilton.

The final two club championships for 2013 were decided last week, and Doug Robertson was the victor in both the open singles, and with Gill, the Nominated Mixed Pairs. Congratulations to you both.

Winners of the Jaxx Roll on Wednesday were Denis and Kathy LaRiviere and Clive Fryer. Plate winners were Brian Ravno, Bill Ralph and Bernice Shaw. Well played to all the winners, and thanks to our generous sponsors.

We will be playing our annual match against Umgeni on Friday 24th January at Umgeni.

On Saturday we were pleasantly surprised to have Ann Roberson, a past president, join us for tea. She has moved back to Hilton and will probably re-join the club soon.

Duties: 26 Jan – 1 Feb: OOD: George Oldham. Tabs: Dave Hammond. Duty Team: Colin Watson. Teas on 1 Feb: Pamela & Des Morrish. Biscuits: 21 & 23 Jan. Peter Ayerst & Jill Bannatyne.

News supplied by Hilton Bowling Club.

Angel Goge is welcomed to the 2014 school year at Laddsworth Primary School in Hilton by two Grade 7 boys, Liam Wedge on the left and Brogan Tedder on the right.

News supplied by Laddsworth Primary School.

No, this is not a case of inaccurate product information, but something much more dire. The rookie explorer Phoebe has expanded her wanderings from the colossal terrain of the couch and disappeared into the wild unchartered territories of Hilton. Please help us get her home, her absence disturbs the equilibrium and everything is topsy-turvy. Due to her inexperience in travel, it is uncertain whether or not she knows where Steers is to fill her tummy, and her good nutrition is of the utmost importance.

She lives at 500 Celtis Road, and we can be contacted on 082 453 2929/033 343 3879. Alternately, if she is found by you, gracious Samaritan, the two vets in Hilton can also be kindly used as drop-off points.

PS Don't bother calling her by name, she only answers to bugle calls and the Carte Blanche intro song.

36th Annual Ronnie Davel to be held on 12th Janiary 2014, Registration will take place on Saturday 11th at Laddsworth Primary School from 10h00 to 13h00 and from 05h30 on race day.

Never Never Land Creche in Hilton is headed up by Zandile, the founder, who began this initiative about 12 years ago. Highlights of the last term at Never Never Land Creche include a trip to Crafty Duck and then the very important Graduation Ceremony which was held on Saturday the 23rd November 2013.

Melany Sanchez, a volunteer teacher at Never Never Land Creche shared these photos with us and more have been added to their gallery.

On Saturday thirty-five members put in their tabs, giving us a broken four and five rinks of trips. To add an extra element of interest we played three skins of six ends each. As frequently happens with drawn trips, there were some imbalances in the teams, but the skins format gave even the weaker teams a chance for some success. When all the scores were in, three teams had won all three skins, giving them ten points each. Using shot difference as a tie-breaker the winners were Chris Lake, John Fowler, Arthur Daugherty and Margie Garrard, who each received a bottle of wine.

Teams for the Christmas Cup will be drawn on Thursday evening after bowls. There are still vacancies for this competition and entries will be accepted up to tea time on Thursday.

Weather permitting we will follow our normal programme of bowls over the holiday period.

The new sponsored trips competition will kick off on Friday 3 January. Teams of trips from neighbouring clubs are also invited to enter. Entry will cost R75 per team, and hampers of meat will be on offer as prizes. Contact Derick Hull on 082 935 3150 to enter.

The Club calendar is ready for distribution. If you do not have access to e-mail, ask a friend to print a copy for you.

Duties: 22 - 28 Dec: OOD: Dave Hammond. Tabs: Jean Pluke. Duty Team: Gil van der Hoven.

Teas on 28 December: Margaret Meek & Vernon Hickinbotham. Biscuits: 24 & 26 Dec. Pamela Morrish & Mike Mylne.

News supplied by Hilton Bowling Club.

With just three sleeps until the big day, you should find out what's on at Hilton's POSH Market on MONDAY, the 16th December 2013.

What's on...

09.00am Caledonian Pipers open the market day
11.00am Erin Fourie in the Tudor Room
12.00pm Charles Webster from Undercover in the Tudor Room
01.00pm Father Christmas is expected in the foyer
01.00pm Di Veness in the Tudor Room
02.00pm Over 65's Happy Shopping Hour
02.00pm Music by Mark Schonau in the garden
02.00pm Music by Sean of Sound Mechanix
03.00pm Market closes

All day action will include zorbing by Groovy Balls in the courtyard and tennis with Chris Folker (CF Tennis) on the court.

Protea Hotel, Hilton will set up a self-service salad bar with steak, crab or chicken salad available at R50.00. Boerewors rolls will be on sale at R20.00 with a choice of relishes. Toasted sandwiches will also be available.

Shopping pleasures and informative displays will be supplied by:
Adventure Fitness, Angill Candy Creations, Anita's Jewellery, Argilla Pottery, Ballie's Original Thunderbums, Bella Jo Gourmet Pasta, Big Valley Dried Fruit & Nuts, Bits and Bobs, Buchanan Interiors, Chocolate Sensations, Chris Wireworks, Cookin', Crossways Health Centre, Crystal Deva, Devine Presents, Doomies Dresses, Eaton's Fine Foods, Elbows Up, Fill the Gap, Forest Garden Produce, Franklin Framing, FreeMe, Glass Cuttings, Hilton Clothing, Hilton Travel, Honey Jewellery, iMBALI Blends, Integrity Oils, Just So!, Just-U, Kalahari Kids, KZN Wildlife Kids Club, Lemonlicious, L.Y.N. Food, Marvellous Munchies, Merriducks, MiaB Creations, Miglio Designer Jewellery, MoiraLaine Jewellery, NCF Community Projects, Nuts About Books & Toys, Papillon Pots, Pelican Print, Rollin Vintage, Rondavel Soaps, Ronnoco Nursery, ROSABELLA, Silver Penny, The Aloe Nursery, The Gourmet Greek, The Green Herb, The Soap Room, Thekari - Armour of God, True Compass Tours, Viking Foods, Waterwise Gardens and With love Leandra.

Look out for the overflow parking area between the hotel and the highway off-ramp.

More about the over 65's Happy Shopping Hour! The following will have a special or discount for over 65's during the Happy Shopping Hour from 2.00pm until 3.00pm;
L.Y.N. Foods, Buchanan Interiors, Viking Foods, Franklin Framing, Hilton Clothing, Lemonlicious, The Soap Room, Forest Garden Produce, Mia B Creations, MoiraLaine Jewellery, The Green Herb Co, Anita's Jewellery, Rosabella and Ballie's Original Thunderbums!

See you at Hilton's POSH Market!

Take a read through as we share more about some of the 'POSH nosh' that you will be able to shop for at Hilton's POSH Market on Monday, 16th December 2013 at Protea Hotel, Hilton.

L.Y.N. Food will be indoors with their trout, trout pate and delicious bread, Our Daily Bread.

Viking Foods are bringing homemade flavoured sausage – flavours include sage & onion, apple & cheese, lemon & herb, chilli, leek and traditional English banger! Their customers always return because of high quality and taste, so track them down in a gazebo out front.

Paul Eaton's has a huge following of loyal food lovers, if you have not tasted why, this is your chance to bag some of the wonderful flavours that are available from his kitchen. Look out for Eaton's Fine Foods at Hilton's POSH Market in the Tudor room.

In the garden, MiaB Creations will have her famous mince pies for sale and you can get homemade Lemonade from Lemonlicious in their gazebo, no preservatives, organic lemons and just 6% sugar. Lemonlicious sell cordials and Limoncello.

iMbali Blends will have Virgin Coconut Oil, Herbal Salts lower in sodium seasoning and Cook @ Home Blends for easy to prepare meals; these have recipes on the packet. All their products are from natural sources, local where possible and non-irradiated! Find them in the Tudor room.

Bella Jo Pasta will have homemade, egg based gourmet tagliatelle in a variety of flavours (plain egg, herb, sundried tomato, tricolore, olive &squid ink) stashed inside for you to buy. As well as frozen meals (beef, chicken and vegetable lasagne & moussaka), pesto, their well-known 'chilli salsa' and spanakopita (spinach pies with homemade phyllo pastry. All their products are made with pure, natural ingredients with no added colorants or preservatives.

Everybody loves Elbows Up for their pomegranate dressing, balsamic reductions and peri-peri sauces find them indoors.

If you are looking for a leaner and healthier meat, grab some duck from Merriducks who will be in the Tudor room.

Marvellous Munchies have cookies that are always a hit with kids and adults too and will be set up in the garden.

Other foods that will on sale indoors include; Big Valley Dried Fruit & Nuts who have a well-priced range of healthy foods, Ballie's Original Thunderbums sauces and relishes are always big sellers, Handcrafted Belgian chocolates and chocolate confectionary, the finest quality chocolate and delicious fillings by Chocolate Sensations is a must buy and With love Leandra will bring bakes and preserves to thrill your taste buds.

Cheese and yoghurt from The Gourmet Greek is a favourite on KZN Midlands tables tables, stock up in the Tudor room!

FreeMe's samosas are sold to assist with funding this wildlife rehabilitation centre, get some on Monday 16th December 2013, in the garden at Protea Hotel, Hilton between 9.00am and 3.00pm.

Come for lunch! Protea Hotel, Hilton will set up a salad bar. Choose from a steak, chicken or crab slad at R50.00, wors rolls with relish at R20.00 or toasted sandwiches. We look forward to seeing you there!

The Committee of the Hilton Ratepayers' Association (HRA) decided at its meeting in December 2013 to distribute a Newsletter every quarter in order to publicise more widely its activities, and also to obtain further feedback from the ratepayers and residents of Hilton. This first Newsletter gives a summary of past and current activities, possibilities for further activities, committee membership, and communication details.

Membership of the HRA is open to all ratepayers in Wards 6 and 7 of the uMngeni Municipality at a membership fee of R200.00 per year.

Recent activities have included the following:
• Participation as an Interested and Affected Party (IAP) in the Environmental Impact Assessments (EIA) for developments in Hilton. The aim is to ensure that development is carried out in such a way that the ambience of Hilton Village is enhanced while at the same time recognising the need to support appropriate development and progress.
• In particular as an IAP in the proposed Hilton – Mondi development by Larusco Developments the HRA was involved in appointing specialists to assist in the first stage of the EIA, and most recently has instructed attorneys to appeal the approval granted for the provision of wastewater treatment facilities. A decision on this appeal has not yet been made. Participation of the HRA with others in the EIA process contributed to the removal of any industrial sites from the development, and the requirement for the HRA and others to be authorised to give oversight on detailed progress on the development;
• The HRA participated strongly in the property valuation roll carried out in 2011 and 2012, including the preparation of a detailed analysis which was submitted to Council officials;
• In dealing with infrastructure services, members of the HRA Committee were involved in the planning, design and construction stages of the new power line, preparation and submission of a detailed survey of road conditions, and water supply refurbishment and upgrade planning;
• The HRA has always adopted a constructive and cooperative approach in its dealings with officials and councillors of the uMngeni and Msunduzi Municipalities and the mutual relationships are therefore generally good;
• The Committee is working with other representative residential organisations in the uMngeni Municipality for the development of a joint forum to deal with issues where a combined effort may be beneficial.
The Committee currently has eight members with an acting Chairman, a Secretary and a Treasurer. Increased membership is desirable and is entirely voluntary. Communications with residents and ratepayers are by email (1,250 addresses) and Facebook (800 addresses).
The Committee meets once a month and as required when dealing with specific issues. The Councillor presents a report on Council activities and receives input from the Committee which can be referred to the Council. This includes a summary of the financial position of the uMngeni Municipality. It was noted at the last meeting that the payment of rates by Hilton residents is in arrears in the amount of approximately R9.5 million!
Membership funds have been used to pay for specialist advice, for the preparation and printing of reports, and for the hire of facilities for the AGM.

These three amazing cruise packages are available from Hilton Travel. Book now and set sail during 2014!

Cruise One
April – June 2014
Flights + Venice Hotel + Cruise + Airport Taxes
Your journey begins with a flight to Venice with Emirates. You will be transferred to your Venice hotel for 1 nights stay which includes breakfast. You will then set sail on a 9 night cruise onboard the lovely MSC Armonia from Venice and visiting Ancona, Santorini, Izmir, Istanbul, Cefalonia, Split and back to Venice. Your journey ends with a flight back home.

Inside Cabin @ R20,999 per person
Outside Cabin @ R21,599 per person
Balcony @ R25,599 per person

Cruise Two
October-November 2014
FLIGHTS + 4 NIGHT'S HOTEL LAKE GARDA + 3 TOURS + VENICE HOTEL + CRUISE + AIRPORT TAXES
Your 12 night journey begins with a flight to Venice with Emirates. You will be transferred to your hotel at Lake Garda, your home for 4 nights which will include breakfast and dinner. Tours are included of Lake Garda, Verona and Milan. One nights accommodation in Venice including breakfast. You will then set sail on a 7 night cruise onboard the spectacular Royal Caribbean's Splendour of the Seas from Venice and visiting Dubrovnik, Kusadasi, Santorini, Katakolon, Venice. Your journey ends with a flight back home.

Inside Cabin @ R28,999 per person
Outside Cabin @ R32,999 per person
Balcony @ R39,999 per person

Cruise Three
October 2014
FLIGHTS + 4 NIGHT'S HOTEL LAKE GARDA + 3 TOURS + VENICE HOTEL + CRUISE + AIRPORT TAXES
Your 12 night journey begins with a flight to Venice with Emirates. You will be transferred to your hotel at Lake Garda, your home for 4 nights which will include breakfast and dinner. Tours are included of Lake Garda, Verona and Milan. One nights accommodation in Venice including breakfast. You will then set sail on a 7 night cruise onboard the luxurious Queen Elizabeth from Venice and visiting Korcula, Heraklion, Rhodes, Kusadasi and Athens. Your journey ends with a flight back home.

Inside Cabin @ R31,999 per person
Outside Cabin @ R38,999 per person + FREE UPGRADE TO A BALCONY CABIN
Grill Suite @ R54,999 per person

Subject to availability at the time of booking.

The results for the 36th Annual Ronnie Davel held on 12th Janiary 2014 can be viewed here. The prizes awarded can be viewed here.

The images below are by sportpix and runners/walkers can follow them on twitter@sportpix_KZN or tag themselves on their facbook page. To order photos visit www.sportpix.co.za.

A Happy New year to all our members and to all who read this column. On Friday we launched the IF Sponsored Trips competitions. Twelve teams took part. The games were organised as three skins of seven ends, the same teams matched throughout the morning. Winners were Tom Hartley, Peter Bailie and Lorna Allen. The second team consisted of Chris Lake, Graham Appleby and Arthur Daugherty. David Mason and Lloyd Rowlands from the sponsors, Investment Facilitators, presented the winners with packs of meat. Joan Byrom won a meat pack on a lucky draw.

Joan, Olga Hutt and Margie Meek scored a nine during the morning. Well done to all the victors and very sincere thanks to IF for their support.

Saturday saw another full field of thirty-six players, including new bowlers Nina and Mike Guest, competing in the Quarry Spar Chicken Run. This time Thelma Mylne, Des Morrish and Richard Lister collected a full house! Winners of the chickens were John Pattrick, Pamela Morrish and Brian Newton. Thanks to Quarry Spar for donating the prizes.

Duties: 5 – 11 Jan: OOD: Ron Buchel. Tabs: John Pluke. Duty Team: Chris Purchase. Teas on 11 Jan: Pat Bennet & Chris Lake. Biscuits: 14 & 16 Jan. George Oldham & Fred Palmer.

Duties:12 – 18 Jan: OOD: Jean Pluke. Tabs: Jill Bannatyne. Duty Team: Fred Palmer. Teas: 18 Jan: John Arnott & Dave Stevenson. Biscuits: 21 & 23 Jan: John Pattrick & Joan Anderson.

News supplied by Hilton Bowling Club.

Hilton garden club member, Jacqueline Kalley, has just released two new books for gardeners. Previously Jacqueline co-edited the award-winning Veld, Vlei and Rose Gardens: An Inspiration for South African Gardeners published by Otterley Press in 2011.

The gorgeous new book, KwaZulu-Natal is My Garden provides a fascinating insight into the differing ways in which people choose to use their space, whether it be tiny or stretching across the countryside; high in the mountain regions, in the superb gardening conditions of the Midlands, or dreaming in the coastal warmth; gardeners with little cottages or grand mansions collectively organising their surroundings according to location, soil diversity and climatic conditions – and their personal preference. Thirty-eight gardens have been selected to show something of the wide spectrum of gardens in the province; their stories inspire, entertain and educate. Beautifully illustrated, these gardens and their relationship to the homes on the properties are ample proof that KwaZulu-Natal is indeed our Garden Province.

Eric Cornhill is the chief photographer of this lavishly illustrated book.

Retail price for KwaZulu-Natal is My Garden is R395 with trade discount for booksellers

Also available now is The Essential Garden Notebook, another Otterley Press production.

Gardeners dream in the poetry of colour, design and fragrance. They think in words such as romantic, lavish, or scented. Gardening in reality, is very hard work, requiring forethought and planning, the all-important budget and, sometimes an aching back. This Gardening Notebook is the essential extension to your garden tools – a mini reference book that cleverly interweaves Phyl Palframan's gardening thoughts together with practical tips on how to achieve the desired results. It also provides space for your personal observations and so becomes a record of your gardening aspirations. The illustrations are beautiful, whimsical and remind one of all the joys that gardening can bring.

The Essential Garden Notebook is priced at R150.

You can order via email, fax or snail-mail using one of the addresses detailed below;

EMAIL This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. OR

FAX +27 0867198397 OR

POST Otterley, 5 Wimbledon Gardens
18 Frances Staniland Road
Montrose
Pietermaritzburg 3201
South Africa

In Hilton? You can save R45.00 on KwaZulu-Natal is My Garden! Get your copies from Penny Purchase, order by emailing This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.

We all associate the Christmas season with wonderful feasts of festive food. Large joyous meals and rolling around with full groaning tummies. Mince pies, turkeys, chocolate and other decadent treats. Many of us want to spoil our pets too and add special treats to their bowls. Herein lies the problem though and all too often an over enthusiastic well-meaning owner ends up at the vet with a rather unhappy pet. What should you be careful of?

Pets are not small humans and unfortunately many of the things we consider treats can be harmful to your cat or dog. Never feed your pet anything very rich such as turkey skin, marinated meats or cream.

Feeding your pet large amounts of anything (even lean meat) can lead to digestive discomfort.

Onions, Garlic and Chives should never be fed to animals as it causes the breakdown of red blood cells and can make your pet severely ill. Alcohol is dangerous as pets are influenced by a much smaller amount than we are and can be made to feel very uncomfortable. Raw eggs can cause salmonella infections which can in turn affect the entire family. Fat can lead to pancreatitis and bones can break teeth, obstruct or even tear the intestines.

What about sweet treats? As with us, excessive calories lead to obesity and its resulting problems.

Once again, what may seem like a small amount to us has a much larger effect on your pet. A small biscuit is equivalent to a hamburger. Now imagine eating a hamburger every day on top of your normal meals!

Cats and dogs are unable to digest grapes and raisins and eating these may lead to kidney failure. Remember not to feed your beloved animal Christmas Cake.

Chocolate can make your pet fat, but the theobromine in it can also lead to serious consequences such as heart murmurs, tremors, seizures and death. Dark and cooking chocolate is the most dangerous, but all chocolate should be avoided. Caffeine may also lead to seizures and hypersensitivities. Never feed you pet raw dough. The dough will expand in the cat or dog's stomach and cause extreme discomfort. Xylitol is an artificial sweetener found in diet foods, some kinds of candy and toothpaste. In animals this product can lead to liver failure and seizures.

These are but a few of the things we may eat commonly that may affect your pet. Don' t feed foods that were not designed with pets in mind. Read the labels closely and always feed, even dog or cat food, in moderation.

Last Christmas most of our emergencies were food-related (old leftovers, turkey bones, too much fat).

There are several healthy treats available for pets. If you want to include your dog or cat in the celebrations feed it a safe and healthy treat and make your holiday a happy, stress free time.

Article by Dr Lillian Hirzel of Hilton Vet Hospital.

Early morning drizzle did not deter the stallholders at Hilton's POSH Market Christmas 2013 and by the time they were set up the sun was clearly trying to get in on the action, it did not quite win but the day remained sufficiently dry for all the planned action to go ahead. Groovy Balls brought rolling fun times to the pool area and Chris Folker from CF Tennis enjoyed meeting tennis enthusiasts on the court.

The Caledonian Pipers drew a mesmerised audience and looked awesome against the backdrop of our splendid Tudor styled Protea Hotel. Local business coach, Patrick Greenaway played in the band, despite having recently been involved in a motor accident.

The rest of the day's entertainment was smoothly delivered by Erin Fourie, Charles Webster of Undercover and Di Veness. All sound was professionally managed by Sean Swanson of Sound Mechanix. The late afternoon saw well-known fiddler Mark Schonau playing equally familiar tunes.

A visit by Father Christmas delighted younger children and while a few of the little ones found him a teensy bit scary, some adult fans of could not resist snuggling up for a photograph. Wedgewood Nougat and Tasha's Fantastic Fudge was handed out after chats about what was on Christmas lists this year.

POSH shopping pleasures and informative displays were set up by Adventure Fitness, Angill Candy Creations, Anita's Jewellery, Argilla Pottery, Ballie's Original Thunderbums, Bella Jo Gourmet Pasta, Big Valley Dried Fruit & Nuts, Bits and Bobs, Buchanan Interiors, Chocolate Sensations, Chris Wireworks, Cookin', Crossways Health Centre, Crystal Deva, Devine Presents, Eaton's Fine Foods, Elbows Up, Fill the Gap, Forest Garden Produce, Franklin Framing, FreeMe, Glass Cuttings, Hilton Clothing, Hilton Travel, Honey Jewellery, iMBALI Blends, Integrity Oils, Just So!, Just-U, Kalahari Kids, KZN Wildlife Kids Club, Lemonlicious, L.Y.N. Food, Marvellous Munchies, Merriducks, MiaB Creations, Miglio Designer Jewellery, MoiraLaine Jewellery, NCF Community Projects, Nuts About Books & Toys, Papillon Pots, Pelican Print, Rollin Vintage, Rondavel Soaps, Ronnoco Nursery, ROSABELLA, Silver Penny, The Aloe Nursery, The Gourmet Greek, The Green Herb, The Soap Room, Thekari - Armour of God, Viking Foods and With love Leandra kept our shoppers happy.

Our POSH porters, Mitchell and Brad, did a great job in helping vendors with setting up and dismantling their stands.

A huge round of applause goes to all involved in making the day a success with a special mention for Protea Hotel, Hilton, our hosts. The boerewors rolls were a hit, the salads delicious, the service was great, their staff welcoming and the venue uniquely ambient.

Click here to find out more about our local POSH supporters.

Christmas is often a very difficult time for many people who have experienced the loss of someone close to them. I am writing this from the perspective of the loss of a child, but it can apply to any loss.

How can we get excited about a special family time, when there is this huge gaping hole where our child used to be?

How can we try and be joyful when we feel like part of us has been physically torn away from our bodies? It feels like you as if you are going away on a holiday, but without your special love...we should be excited to go on holiday, but we can't be because we are doing it without our complete family.

We feel as if every day is grey, without energy to do even the most basic things. Do we feel like putting up a Christmas tree? No. Do we have the energy to shop for gifts? No. Do we want to be surrounded by people who can't understand how we are feeling? No. Do we want to plaster a smile on our face, and pretend we are happy? No. Do we want to go to an emotive Church service? No. Do we want to go through all the same traditional exciting activities that are repeated every Christmas...those things special just to our family? No. They are too painful to bear - because our hearts are too vulnerable, tender and sore. We feel so fragile that we feel as if we could shatter into a million pieces with having to endure one more painful emotion.

So what can we do to make it better for ourselves?

• We can realize that others who have not experienced a loss cannot possibly understand how we are feeling- acknowledge this, and treat them with compassion. But, having said that, accept that they will try to make us feel better and most of the attempts won't work. But let us recognize that they are trying, but they don't know what to do...and before our loss, we may well have done exactly the same things. So try not to be hurt, patronising or judgmental toward them.
What else can we do to "guard our heart" and make sure we "weather" Christmas? You may like some ideas and dislike other suggestions listed below, so just take the ones you like, and discard the rest.
• We can go somewhere totally different for Christmas day/holidays- where we have never been before, so that we are not confronted with memories of previous happier years.
• We love to talk about our child who had died, with laughter and tears, so bring them into the day. The worst thing is for everyone to pretend that our "angel children" never existed. We honour their memories by talking about them.
• We can light a candle next to a photograph of them, so their light is still felt on Christmas day.
• We can change the routine of Christmas day completely, and not do the same things we have always done. It is too heart-breaking to do those same things without our special souls with us.
• We can place a small picture of them somewhere on the Christmas tree, they are angels after all!
• Don't do anything you feel you "should" do, only do those things you "want" to do.
• We must follow our hearts and do only that which we feel capable of doing, don't feel "pushed" into doing what is too painful, especially if others think it "will be so good for you".
• Never be embarrassed of our tears, we miss so deeply, because we loved so deeply. Our tears honour the special love we have for our children.
• Take time at the beginning of the day just to have quiet time to honour our memories, "talk" to our "angel child" and feel that we have spent some quality time with only them. Honour them by connecting with them, quietly, in our own special way, saying what we would like to say if they were still alive.
• Write a letter to your "angel child" to be read out (or not) on Christmas Eve just to the immediate family. This often releases a lot of pent up emotion, and allows a slightly more peaceful Christmas day. Mike, Cath and I found this to be exceptionally healing.
• Visualise how Christmas day will be, and know that it WILL be different, so try and prepare yourself for the different feelings you may have, the way others may treat you differently, don't expect that it will be the same, it will never be the same again.

And finally, a message of hope: the joy of Christmas does eventually return! I know it may not feel like that now. Christmas will never be the same, but as our hearts heal, we learn to let the joy in again. And then we feel the joy even more intensely, because we have felt such devastating pain. On Christmas Day, our thoughts, prayers, love and care are especially with all who have suffered crippling losses.

This "Survival kit" for the first few Christmas's after the loss of a child is written by Life Coach Cherri Forsyth - on behalf of the Angel Mums Support Group

Although we were worried about the rain, twenty-four intrepid bowlers gathered at the club on Tuesday afternoon to play for the monthly prizes sponsored by Lister & Lister. This month we had meal vouchers from La Popote. The winners were Des Morrish, Gill Robertson and Dave Trickett. Runners-up, Chris Purchase and his team won avocados, courtesy of John Fowler. Many thanks to Richard and John for the prizes.

The entry list for the Christmas Cup to be played on 21 December is on the board.

Jaxx Roll will take place on 18th December.

Members are reminded that subs for 2014 must be paid by 15th December.

We intend introducing a new event next year to be played on the first Friday morning of each month. Details to be published next week.

Duties: 15 - 21 Dec: OOD: Thelma Mylne. Tabs: Chris Purchase. Duty Team: John Pluke. Teas: 21 Dec: N/A – Christmas Cup. Biscuits: 17 & 19 Dec. Margaret Meek & Des Morrish.

News submitted by Hilton Bowling Club.